I've seen the assumptions made about the group, so I am going to take the time to address the assumptions here.
A. We hate Natural Birth- No, we hate seeing the lies about it (ie it's not painful, you'll bond better, better chance at breastfeeding, etc). We hate seeing moms guilted into doing it. We hate seeing mothers berated and treated badly for not doing it. How many of these moms are going in there expecting orgasms and no pain only to find out that it freaking hurts and either playing the lines in their head or caving and feeling horrible afterwards. I believe this is a recipe for PPD!! Women are being set up and I don't think it's right at all. Many of us on that board have had unmedicated births, some of us have had homebirths (with a few deaths and transfers and brain injuries thrown in there). So, aside from the group name, you don't see us bashing natural birth itself.
B. Being in a group where natural birth isn't on a pedestool must mean everyone adheres to the "mainstream" lifestyle. BWAHAHAHAHAHA Ok, let me compose myself now! Not thinking natural childbirth or homebirth are the end all, be all of parenting doesn't mean a few "crunchy" things aren't done by members. Actually, I don't think we have any anti-vaxers and if we did, they don't speak of it because we do believe in vaccines! So, we have women who breastfeed and are not militant about it. We're just like "Yep, I breastfeed/have breastfed, no biggie". We have women who babywear and some do it just for the convenience factor! We have moms who homeschool. There are cloth diapering moms and boy can they trigger an ex-cloth diaperer! Sometimes I miss those cute, fluffy little butts just not the laundry! We can have knock down drag out arguments over circumcision (which I won't touch).
C. Ladies are mean. Ok, maybe that can be fairly accurate depending upon what you see discussed! There are also times where we joke around and laugh and just have fun. Like we laugh about how some of these mommy bloggers say "I'm taking a break", only to have the attention whore back in a few days when all the groveling and falling over themselves members have stopped. We get mad knowing that a blogger and her followers tamper with store products in order to promote their anti-circumcision agenda or give mothers thank you for breastfeeding business cards placed right in front of formula cans. Why they don't stick to blogging is beyond me!
If you really look and pay attention, you'll see a group of women that really cares about eachother and we care about the messages being given to other moms. We see parenting decisions as just that, a decision that doesn't make anyone more superior than another. we hate seeing women harmed by buying into the whole natural birth movement or the CPM's are educated crap. What was the old saying about not judging a book by it's cover?? Take the time to get to know people and learn about where we stand before deciding that the group name conveys the message we send, you just might be surprised!! After all, several of those bloggers we discuss has a completely opposite message than their name implies.
Friday, August 12, 2011
The Fed Up Group
I've seen the assumptions made about the group, so I am going to take the time to address the assumptions here.
A. We hate Natural Birth- No, we hate seeing the lies about it (ie it's not painful, you'll bond better, better chance at breastfeeding, etc). We hate seeing moms guilted into doing it. We hate seeing mothers berated and treated badly for not doing it. How many of these moms are going in there expecting orgasms and no pain only to find out that it freaking hurts and either playing the lines in their head or caving and feeling horrible afterwards. I believe this is a recipe for PPD!! Women are being set up and I don't think it's right at all. Many of us on that board have had unmedicated births, some of us have had homebirths (with a few deaths and transfers and brain injuries thrown in there). So, aside from the group name, you don't see us bashing natural birth itself.
B. Being in a group where natural birth isn't on a pedestool must mean everyone adheres to the "mainstream" lifestyle. BWAHAHAHAHAHA Ok, let me compose myself now! Not thinking natural childbirth or homebirth are the end all, be all of parenting doesn't mean a few "crunchy" things aren't done by members. Actually, I don't think we have any anti-vaxers and if we did, they don't speak of it because we do believe in vaccines! So, we have women who breastfeed and are not militant about it. We're just like "Yep, I breastfeed/have breastfed, no biggie". We have women who babywear and some do it just for the convenience factor! We have moms who homeschool. There are cloth diapering moms and boy can they trigger an ex-cloth diaperer! Sometimes I miss those cute, fluffy little butts just not the laundry! We can have knock down drag out arguments over circumcision (which I won't touch).
C. Ladies are mean. Ok, maybe that can be fairly accurate depending upon what you see discussed! There are also times where we joke around and laugh and just have fun. Like we laugh about how some of these mommy bloggers say "I'm taking a break", only to have the attention whore back in a few days when all the groveling and falling over themselves members have stopped. We get mad knowing that a blogger and her followers tamper with store products in order to promote their anti-circumcision agenda or give mothers thank you for breastfeeding business cards placed right in front of formula cans. Why they don't stick to blogging is beyond me!
If you really look and pay attention, you'll see a group of women that really cares about eachother and we care about the messages being given to other moms. We see parenting decisions as just that, a decision that doesn't make anyone more superior than another. we hate seeing women harmed by buying into the whole natural birth movement or the CPM's are educated crap. What was the old saying about not judging a book by it's cover?? Take the time to get to know people and learn about where we stand before deciding that the group name conveys the message we send, you just might be surprised!! After all, several of those bloggers we discuss has a completely opposite message than their name implies.
A. We hate Natural Birth- No, we hate seeing the lies about it (ie it's not painful, you'll bond better, better chance at breastfeeding, etc). We hate seeing moms guilted into doing it. We hate seeing mothers berated and treated badly for not doing it. How many of these moms are going in there expecting orgasms and no pain only to find out that it freaking hurts and either playing the lines in their head or caving and feeling horrible afterwards. I believe this is a recipe for PPD!! Women are being set up and I don't think it's right at all. Many of us on that board have had unmedicated births, some of us have had homebirths (with a few deaths and transfers and brain injuries thrown in there). So, aside from the group name, you don't see us bashing natural birth itself.
B. Being in a group where natural birth isn't on a pedestool must mean everyone adheres to the "mainstream" lifestyle. BWAHAHAHAHAHA Ok, let me compose myself now! Not thinking natural childbirth or homebirth are the end all, be all of parenting doesn't mean a few "crunchy" things aren't done by members. Actually, I don't think we have any anti-vaxers and if we did, they don't speak of it because we do believe in vaccines! So, we have women who breastfeed and are not militant about it. We're just like "Yep, I breastfeed/have breastfed, no biggie". We have women who babywear and some do it just for the convenience factor! We have moms who homeschool. There are cloth diapering moms and boy can they trigger an ex-cloth diaperer! Sometimes I miss those cute, fluffy little butts just not the laundry! We can have knock down drag out arguments over circumcision (which I won't touch).
C. Ladies are mean. Ok, maybe that can be fairly accurate depending upon what you see discussed! There are also times where we joke around and laugh and just have fun. Like we laugh about how some of these mommy bloggers say "I'm taking a break", only to have the attention whore back in a few days when all the groveling and falling over themselves members have stopped. We get mad knowing that a blogger and her followers tamper with store products in order to promote their anti-circumcision agenda or give mothers thank you for breastfeeding business cards placed right in front of formula cans. Why they don't stick to blogging is beyond me!
If you really look and pay attention, you'll see a group of women that really cares about eachother and we care about the messages being given to other moms. We see parenting decisions as just that, a decision that doesn't make anyone more superior than another. we hate seeing women harmed by buying into the whole natural birth movement or the CPM's are educated crap. What was the old saying about not judging a book by it's cover?? Take the time to get to know people and learn about where we stand before deciding that the group name conveys the message we send, you just might be surprised!! After all, several of those bloggers we discuss has a completely opposite message than their name implies.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Mad Props!
Right now (as I'm sitting in my room supposed to be cleaning), I'm overwhelmed at the tides that are turning in the midwifery world. Midwives are speaking out about the state of homebirth and the midwifery world. So, I'm going to take the time to send out some props to some wonderful women who are promoting safety and truly care about mothers and their babies!
#1- Miss Amber Plyler. Amber was a student midwife working on her CPM. She has changed her path and is now working on her CNM. I have seen the transformation in her and am so incredibly proud of the person I am seeing emerge. She is truly knowledgeable and will be one hell of an asset to the midwifery community. I'm happy to have her as a friend!
#2- Deb O'Connell from Carrboro Midwifery. I think it was back when Amy Medwin was arrested and I saw Deb on various sites discussing the arrest and why Medwin shouldn't of been practicing and thought to myself, "Damn, she is awesome". Sure enough, we got in contact with one another and she is a good friend. She is all about safety and the truth. There is no sugar coating from her. She doesn't spout the "complications are just a variation of normal", bull shit. She lays it out there! If something comes up, she will transfer because she doesn't take chances. She respects birth and doesn't trust it. Deb is quite middle of the road from my observations.
#3- NavelgazingMidwife, Barb. She has spoken out about the mistruth she sees. She does promote safety. When you look at her, you see a woman who genuinly cares about these motherrs and their babies. I've cried reading her posts because it's like "somebody cares". I can say that I truly respect this woman and her contribution to the homebirth community. There is no "trust birth" attitude there either. You can tell by reading that she respects birth.
I've seen Deb called a "med"wife because she's a CNM. Why?? She chooses to be educated so, why is that such a bad thing?? A real midwife is actually WITH the woman, not running the damn show or not caring whether mom gets a living baby or not. I would rather have a "med"wife than some uneducated hippy and any woman with common sense should too! I've seen Amber attacked for daring to change gears and become a "med"wife. I tell ya, the stuff said to her fired me up. These people supported her when she was working on her CPM stuff, but suddenly they turned once they learned she was not pursing that. I saw women talking to her like she was a disobediant child who needed scolded. Is that really necessary?? It shows just how cruel women are when you choose to step out of the woo-ish culture. Speaking of cruel women, I saw a comment Barb received for daring to speak out. It was loaded with threats and vile crap. It was basically a shut up message from the midwifery community and from what I know, she's not the first one to receive this, it generally happens anytime a midwife speaks up.
So, Ladies, keep up the good work!!! You are all fantastic!! Readers, please go visit these women and show them some love!!
#1- Miss Amber Plyler. Amber was a student midwife working on her CPM. She has changed her path and is now working on her CNM. I have seen the transformation in her and am so incredibly proud of the person I am seeing emerge. She is truly knowledgeable and will be one hell of an asset to the midwifery community. I'm happy to have her as a friend!
#2- Deb O'Connell from Carrboro Midwifery. I think it was back when Amy Medwin was arrested and I saw Deb on various sites discussing the arrest and why Medwin shouldn't of been practicing and thought to myself, "Damn, she is awesome". Sure enough, we got in contact with one another and she is a good friend. She is all about safety and the truth. There is no sugar coating from her. She doesn't spout the "complications are just a variation of normal", bull shit. She lays it out there! If something comes up, she will transfer because she doesn't take chances. She respects birth and doesn't trust it. Deb is quite middle of the road from my observations.
#3- NavelgazingMidwife, Barb. She has spoken out about the mistruth she sees. She does promote safety. When you look at her, you see a woman who genuinly cares about these motherrs and their babies. I've cried reading her posts because it's like "somebody cares". I can say that I truly respect this woman and her contribution to the homebirth community. There is no "trust birth" attitude there either. You can tell by reading that she respects birth.
I've seen Deb called a "med"wife because she's a CNM. Why?? She chooses to be educated so, why is that such a bad thing?? A real midwife is actually WITH the woman, not running the damn show or not caring whether mom gets a living baby or not. I would rather have a "med"wife than some uneducated hippy and any woman with common sense should too! I've seen Amber attacked for daring to change gears and become a "med"wife. I tell ya, the stuff said to her fired me up. These people supported her when she was working on her CPM stuff, but suddenly they turned once they learned she was not pursing that. I saw women talking to her like she was a disobediant child who needed scolded. Is that really necessary?? It shows just how cruel women are when you choose to step out of the woo-ish culture. Speaking of cruel women, I saw a comment Barb received for daring to speak out. It was loaded with threats and vile crap. It was basically a shut up message from the midwifery community and from what I know, she's not the first one to receive this, it generally happens anytime a midwife speaks up.
So, Ladies, keep up the good work!!! You are all fantastic!! Readers, please go visit these women and show them some love!!
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