Helplessness in Parenting

          When we get pregnant, we see those two lines and immediately start dreaming about the future. We think of how our child will look, their personalities, all the things you get to do with them, names, celebrations with extended family, etc. We dream about it all. We take our vitamins, even if they make us puke. We avoid certain foods and chemicals so that our babies don't get sick. We do everything within our control to ensure our child is safe and healthy.


          What happens when something happens that we can't control? As I sat in the exam room with my 10 year old son yesterday, I couldn't help but think "I feel so helpless". We have done everything and yet here we are dealing with a second relapse with his eyes. We were free and clear, he had been looking perfect, and four days later, it was coming back again. His issues aren't life threatening, but it threatens his vision and that scares the hell out of me. I don't want my son to go blind and neither do his doctors, but this is beyond our control aside from medications and constant appointments. We can't magically fix what is going haywire in his little body.


          This leads me to think about everything and how we really have no control, as much as we like to think we do. It's scary. How can we do everything we can to care for and protect our children and have it still not work? Yeah, this is pretty depressing, but it's true, we are helpless here. It's a really sucky feeling.


          I think about parents whose children are dealing with deadly diseases or new parents watching their premature/sick infant fighting for it's life in a NICU or parents dealing with a severely handicapped child. How do they do it? What support do they have? What can we do to lend support? What can we do to raise awareness of some kind? Think about your strengths and how you can be a valuable asset to parents like these. Let's be there for one another so these parents aren't feeling so helpless. Let's lend them our strength just so they are a little stronger when facing another day. We need to do something! Parenting is divisive enough, so let's unite this way.