Another friend told me of a family member's horrible, mismanaged, traumatic (for mom, dad and baby), intervention-happy birth. I almost told her to stop...it broke my heart. Keep preaching the education and information mamas. Our friends and families need to be educated to be make informed choices for themselves! Start with a competent, knowledgeable, respectful care provider!!!
This is strictly opinion. However it proves that anyone who does not fall for the natural agenda MUST be uneducated and uninformed! How heartbreaking that someone had a birth with interventions!
Sad thing is most women think its normal. Its part of satans plan to destroy the family. To make women fear birth.
Yeah, this has to be one of the funniest things I have ever read! So, if you have a birth with interventions it's because you fear birth and satan will destroy your family for it? Um, so, since over half of my births were natural, am I spared??
I am worried about my friend! She had wanted a natural birth, I sent her all my books (Ina May, Birthing From Within, etc.) She's been texting me for support all along, including last night when she was having contractions. She lives in a different state, near my sister, who just texted me that our friend is at the hospital. Her water broke around 1 this afternoon and she is at 2 cm, has been put on pitocin and already got her epidural. What?! Of course I'm not there so I don't know what kind of support she has or what is truly going on but I can' t help but feel disappointed! Why did she spend so much time preparing for natural to get an epidural at 2 cm? Did she not read the books I sent, does she not understand an epi at 2 can stall her labor? I am trying not to judge, I swear, but I know I am anyway. Maybe I'm taking this too personal because I have spent so much time with her about this I almost feel like her long distance labor coach. I hope the best for her but I don't feel good about this. This is the only place I could think of to come and "rant" a little. I would hate to take any of my frustration out on her. Pray for a good outcome for mama and baby.
Perhaps her friend decided she did not want to go natural after all?? Perhaps she realized labor HURT and didn't want to feel it anymore. At least this poster cannot claim her friend was uninformed right?? But, poor poster, how frustrating that her friends aren't birthing exactly how she wants them to!! I also love the pray for a good outcome statement as if having interventions or an epidural means impending death.
So, in the mind of natural birthers, if you don't give birth how they do, they are mad and heartbroken and all that other jazz. Really, with friends like these, who needs enemies? I am truly amazed that women are so quick to bash friends who aren't having all natural births. I have given birth seven times, with 4 of them being unmedicated. It hurts like hell. It really does. No amount of frau frau language is going to change it. If you want to give birth drug free, do it. Seriously, leave your friends to give birth how they want. Friends don't have to take a test to prove to you that they are informed about interventions. Why is it always assumed that women who do not have all natural non-intervention births aren't informed?? I come across this quite a bit. When I was a homebirther, I was so informed and knew my stuff, but as soon as I stepped into the mainstream, suddenly I knew nothing. Seriously?? Natural birthers don't know everything. It amazes me that they assume anyone who shuns the natural agenda is some uneducated moron when that is certainly not the case.
NCB advocates, when you are pregnant, have the birth you want (but please make sure you are REALLY informed and educated- no, reading a few Ina May books does not make you that way). When your friends are pregnant, it is their turn to decide what works for them and truly is not your business. So, mind YOUR own birth!
4 comments:
I am for a mother to decide what kind of birth she wants. But, in order for that to happen, she must know all her options. So, I guess that is where some natural birthers would want to make sure that info. is out there, since it is not mainstream.
I do not think that the last post by the woman who was worried for her friend was bad. I think she was worried because it is true that getting an epidural that early in the labor could cause labor to stall and lead to a c-section.Even my dr has said this. I know that c-sections can save lives, but if they can be avoided they should, since it is major surgery and poses its own risks.
I commend you for wanting to get all the info out there so that women can make their own informed choices. Every family must decide what they think is best for them.
As a homebirther and hospital birther I am glad I have made informed choices along with the advice of my dr and midwife.
Actually, the latest research shows that even early epidurals don't increase the risk of cesareans. Regardless, the poster of that comment is assuming that *she* knows what is best for her friend, and isn't respecting the fact that her friend and her health care provider know more of the details of her situation and are perfectly capable of making the right decision, even if it isn't a decision that the poster approves of. The poster is assuming that the decision she would make is the better decision that anyone should make.
From what I have seen the preaching and ridicule comes from both sides of the fence. I've had 2 homebirths and I prefer to be at home if possible....I'm not antihospital. I just tend to have some anxiety issues when it comes to laboring/birthing there, but that certainly wouldn't stop me from being there if I had to. I rarely discuss natural/homebirth with friends unless they ask and even then I don't preach it. I don't think less of my friends that choose hospital births and epidurals...that's there choice. I'm just happy for them because they have a new baby to love. It often seems though those friends like to ridicule/judge/ preach to me about my choice to homebirth. Why not just be happy for me because I have a new baby?
I got linked here just today and I loved this entry. In my first pregnancy, I did a lot of reading of the LiveJournal pregnant community which is extremely biased, but I really didn't have an idea how bad it was. Fortunately, I had a doctor I loved and trusted, and I went with the flow and had a great birth and a healthy baby (with the wrinkle that she came out with her head crooked, and I needed a vacuum assist to get her out- but we were both fine, and I recovered quick, so who cares?)
Not long after that, someone posted in the community about being terrified of having an episiotomy and I responded about my birth- that I'd had one, and the vacuum assist, and it wasn't bad at all and healed quickly. That it wasn't as awful as it sounds.
And I got TAKEN APART by an angry mob saying things like, "It's so SAD the medical establishment has you brainwashed to be happy with this result" and "cascade of interventions" and "this is NOT a good result! you need to educate yourself!"
I left the community after that, because REALLY? I was thrilled with how things went, and thrilled to have a healthy baby, and thrilled that even though she came out crooked, things wound up with a quick recovery. And who are they to tell me whether I should be happy or not, or question the judgment of my doctor? Unless they are doctors.... yeah....
Since then, I've had two more easy, healthy hospital births with the same doctor.
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