Showing posts with label Pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pregnancy. Show all posts

Monday, February 14, 2011

Experiencing the rainbow





When my daughter died, all I wanted was to hold another baby in my arms. Sometimes I didn't. We bounced around on this issue for awhile then ultimately decided Mary would be our last child and I would just have my tubes tied. We were happy with our choice. You know what happens when you decide you're done having children?? You get pregnant, lol.

The pregnancy was very rough to say the least. I was a very high risk patient who had to take shots and have testing all the time. This was a very expensive pregnancy as well!! Mentally, It was very taxing. I would go to appointments and just cry. My Dr's would hold my hand and listen, hand me a tissue, reassure me, and give me a big hug. When I talked about Mary, my Dr's would cry with me. I knew if I just needed an ear, they were a phone call away and if I decided to medicate, I could (but chose not to). Physically, I was a wreck. I had progesterone shots weekly that hurt horribly. The ultrasounds that began as nice and cool lost their luster as I got bigger. It is possible to pass out during an ultrasound! Luckily, one of my techs was really good at doing ultrasounds with mom laying on her side. My rainbow, Ireland, would often give the techs a hard time. She would hit the wand and then move so the area we were trying to see was again out of our sights, lol. One neat thing was being able to watch her grow and the manifestation of her personality. I knew before birth that she was going to be very tempermental and strong-willed.

Having the high risk status I did, we knew that we would need to be induced. This would occur at exactly 39 weeks. Of course, all the arrangements were made and the induction was set for Nov 5th. Ireland being the baby she was, did not like plans and decided to do as she pleased. So, I went into labor the week before the induction was scheduled. The labor went pretty good. We had one decel and at that moment, the build up of everything came rushing out and I became an emotional mess. Plans were made for an emergency c-section should we have another one. I was so close to holding her in my arms and I didn't care what needed to be done to get her here. If the decision had been left to me, I would of had a c-section after that decel. I knew they would have to knock me out and I would miss the first few hours of her life. That was fine with me if that meant she would live. They could of done anything they wanted to me as long as it gave me a healthy, living baby.

At 11:20AM, Ireland Elyse was born. She was IDENTICAL to her sister. The emotional breakdown I thought I would have didn't happen then. We just basked in the glory of this baby. When Mary died, my mother came to the hospital, held her granddaughter, and wept horribly. My mother got to be one of my labor coaches with Ireland (luckily since James had worked the night before and was sleeping) and was able to be there for her birth. It was kind of a healing thing for us all. Unfortunately, about six hours after Ireland's birth she had to go to the NICU. We knew that was probably going to happen so we weren't too shocked. The NICU at our hospital has private rooms, so I was able to stay with her after my discharge. I had to go home one night and that really shook me up. Leaving the hospital empty handed again was absolutely horrible. It really brought back the day Mary died when we had to hand her over and leave. I don't think anybody understood why I felt the way I did. My mom kept reassuring me that the situation was nothing like Mary. Luckily, this was the only night I spent away from her.In an odd turn of events, one of the neonatologists that worked on Mary ended up being Ireland's DR! She asked me the one day if Ireland looked like any of her siblings. I told her Yes but the sibling didn't make it and she was the one who worked on her. I later learned that several nurses quit their jobs that day because they couldn't handle it. Dr. Ford them did her best to reassure me that what happened to Mary would not happen to Ireland. After 5 1/2 days in the NICU, Ireland came home!

Bringing our rainbow home introduced a whole new set of challenges. I was always scared that she would just die as soon as I went to sleep. I spent many nights awake. Some nights I would have her in her car seat sleeping while I slept on the couch or have her in the cradle beside my bed with my hand in it so I could feel her chest move or have her in the co-sleeper in my bed so I could be touching her. I always had to be touching her. Those first months were horrible to be honest. Already having a loss and knowing it is possible was the first strike. Then add in all the SIDS moms I knew and continued to come into contact with was another strike to my sanity. I never felt safe. I still don't feel safe with any of my kids. I know I can lose them in an instant. Facing your child's mortality shatters your innocence.

Here we are 15+ months into the journey of having a rainbow baby. I am even more convinced than ever that Mary had a hand in sending this baby sister to us. She is the light of all of our lives. You can see that all the kids feel differently about her than they do eachother. She is Trouble and into everything humanly possible, hence why we recently childproofed for the first time ever! Her personality is off the wall. We have truly been given a run for our money. I would go through the entire pregnancy with her all over again if that meant we would still have her.

Experiencing the rainbow





When my daughter died, all I wanted was to hold another baby in my arms. Sometimes I didn't. We bounced around on this issue for awhile then ultimately decided Mary would be our last child and I would just have my tubes tied. We were happy with our choice. You know what happens when you decide you're done having children?? You get pregnant, lol.

The pregnancy was very rough to say the least. I was a very high risk patient who had to take shots and have testing all the time. This was a very expensive pregnancy as well!! Mentally, It was very taxing. I would go to appointments and just cry. My Dr's would hold my hand and listen, hand me a tissue, reassure me, and give me a big hug. When I talked about Mary, my Dr's would cry with me. I knew if I just needed an ear, they were a phone call away and if I decided to medicate, I could (but chose not to). Physically, I was a wreck. I had progesterone shots weekly that hurt horribly. The ultrasounds that began as nice and cool lost their luster as I got bigger. It is possible to pass out during an ultrasound! Luckily, one of my techs was really good at doing ultrasounds with mom laying on her side. My rainbow, Ireland, would often give the techs a hard time. She would hit the wand and then move so the area we were trying to see was again out of our sights, lol. One neat thing was being able to watch her grow and the manifestation of her personality. I knew before birth that she was going to be very tempermental and strong-willed.

Having the high risk status I did, we knew that we would need to be induced. This would occur at exactly 39 weeks. Of course, all the arrangements were made and the induction was set for Nov 5th. Ireland being the baby she was, did not like plans and decided to do as she pleased. So, I went into labor the week before the induction was scheduled. The labor went pretty good. We had one decel and at that moment, the build up of everything came rushing out and I became an emotional mess. Plans were made for an emergency c-section should we have another one. I was so close to holding her in my arms and I didn't care what needed to be done to get her here. If the decision had been left to me, I would of had a c-section after that decel. I knew they would have to knock me out and I would miss the first few hours of her life. That was fine with me if that meant she would live. They could of done anything they wanted to me as long as it gave me a healthy, living baby.

At 11:20AM, Ireland Elyse was born. She was IDENTICAL to her sister. The emotional breakdown I thought I would have didn't happen then. We just basked in the glory of this baby. When Mary died, my mother came to the hospital, held her granddaughter, and wept horribly. My mother got to be one of my labor coaches with Ireland (luckily since James had worked the night before and was sleeping) and was able to be there for her birth. It was kind of a healing thing for us all. Unfortunately, about six hours after Ireland's birth she had to go to the NICU. We knew that was probably going to happen so we weren't too shocked. The NICU at our hospital has private rooms, so I was able to stay with her after my discharge. I had to go home one night and that really shook me up. Leaving the hospital empty handed again was absolutely horrible. It really brought back the day Mary died when we had to hand her over and leave. I don't think anybody understood why I felt the way I did. My mom kept reassuring me that the situation was nothing like Mary. Luckily, this was the only night I spent away from her.In an odd turn of events, one of the neonatologists that worked on Mary ended up being Ireland's DR! She asked me the one day if Ireland looked like any of her siblings. I told her Yes but the sibling didn't make it and she was the one who worked on her. I later learned that several nurses quit their jobs that day because they couldn't handle it. Dr. Ford them did her best to reassure me that what happened to Mary would not happen to Ireland. After 5 1/2 days in the NICU, Ireland came home!

Bringing our rainbow home introduced a whole new set of challenges. I was always scared that she would just die as soon as I went to sleep. I spent many nights awake. Some nights I would have her in her car seat sleeping while I slept on the couch or have her in the cradle beside my bed with my hand in it so I could feel her chest move or have her in the co-sleeper in my bed so I could be touching her. I always had to be touching her. Those first months were horrible to be honest. Already having a loss and knowing it is possible was the first strike. Then add in all the SIDS moms I knew and continued to come into contact with was another strike to my sanity. I never felt safe. I still don't feel safe with any of my kids. I know I can lose them in an instant. Facing your child's mortality shatters your innocence.

Here we are 15+ months into the journey of having a rainbow baby. I am even more convinced than ever that Mary had a hand in sending this baby sister to us. She is the light of all of our lives. You can see that all the kids feel differently about her than they do eachother. She is Trouble and into everything humanly possible, hence why we recently childproofed for the first time ever! Her personality is off the wall. We have truly been given a run for our money. I would go through the entire pregnancy with her all over again if that meant we would still have her.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Our survey, more in depth

If you have filled out the survey and do not want me using your loss as a case, contact me and give me your info and I will take it out. My goal is not to exploit anyone's loss. I only wish to learn from them. I do not want my loss exploited, but, I do wish to share so that I can help someone else avoid the tragedy we have lived through. Nobody should have to bury their child. I also have to live with the guilt of knowing my choice to use this "experienced and trained" midwife led to my daughter's death. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.



Respondent 1

Had Care from a DR, CPM, and Peri
Had 1st trimester bleeding and an unlisted issue
Had an induced vaginal delivery in the hospital at 34 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to Bilateral Renal Agenesis
Delivered by a DR in the hospital



Respondent 2

Had care from a DR
Pregnancy had no issues
Had an emergency c-section at 26 weeks due to fetal decels
Stillbirth due to Genetic Issues incompatible with life
Delivered by a DR in the hospital



Respondent 3

Had care from a CNM
Had Hypertension and Intrauterine Growth Retardation
Induced Vaginal birth at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth due to Placental Insufficiency and Pregnancy Induced Hypertension
Delivered by CNM in the hospital

Respondent 4

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had Hypertension, Bleeding in the 1st trimester, Pre-eclampsia, and an unlisted issue
Augmented vaginal delivery at 36 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Infection, and Hep B Vaccine Reaction
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 5

Had care from a DR
Had Gestational Diabetes
Vaginal Delivery at 40+ weeks
Unsure if this was a Stillbirth or Neonatal loss but loss is due to Infection
Delivered by an OB (had to of been hospital as mother had a vaccum delivery and IV meds)

Respondent 6

Had care from a DR
Had Hypertension and Pre-Eclampsia
Elective C-section at 37 weeks
Neonatal loss due to unknown reasons
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 7

Had care from a DR, CPM, DEM, and Peri
Had unexplained bleeding in the first and second trimesters
Vaginal delivery at 22 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Prematurity
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 8

Had care from a CPM
No issues in the pregnancy
C-section at 40+ weeks (baby stopped moving)
Neonatal Loss due to Negligent Midwife
Delivered by an OB in the hospital

Respondent 9

Had care from a DR and Peri
Had an unlisted issue
PROM leading to Vaginal birth at 23 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Prematurity, Infection, Brain Damage from birth, NICU acquired illness, and Severe Critical Illness
Hospital delivery

Respondent 10

Had care from a DR
Had Incompetent Cervix and an Unlisted issue
Vaginal Delivery at 20 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to prematurity
Delivered by Respondent 10 at home

Respondent 11

Had care from a LM
No pregnancy issues
Elective c-section at 40+ weeks after homebirth transfer
Stillbirth due to unexplained issues
Delivered by a DR at the hospital

Respondent 12

Had care from a CNM
Had Advanced maternal Age
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth with Unexplained issues
Delivered at home by Respondent 12's SO

Respondent 13

Had care from a DR
Had an unlisted issue
Induced vaginal delivery at 26 weeks
Stillbirth due to Clotting disorder
Delivered in a Birth Center by DR

Respondent 14

Had care from a DR
Had an unlisted issue
Vaginal Delivery at 24 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Prematurity, and NICU acquired illness
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 15

Had care from a DEM
Had an unlisted issue
C-section at 40+ weeks after homebirth transfer
Stillborn due to Uterine Rupture, Negligent Midwife, read mother's HR for babies
Hospital delivery by a DR

Respondent 16

Had care from a CNM
Had Incompetent Cervix, Advanced maternal Age, and an unlisted issue
Augmented Vaginal delivery at 20 weeks
Stillborn due to Incompetent Cervix, GBS+, and Placental infection
Hospital delivery by a DR

Respondent 17

Had dual care with a DR and CNM
Had Gestational Diabetes, Excess Amniotic Fluid, and Preeclampsia
C-section at 36 weeks with breech baby
Neonatal loss due to genetic issues
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 18

Had care from a DR
Had Placenta Accreta
C-section at 32 weeks after trauma from a car accident
Neonatal Loss due to brain damage suffered after car accident
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 19

No Prenatal Care
Had an Unlisted issue
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn due to a cord accident
Delivered at home by Respondent 19

Respondent 20

Had care from a LM
Had an Unlisted issue
Vaginal delivery at 20 weeks
Neonatal loss due to prematurity
delivered at home by Respondent 20

Respondent 21

Had care from a DR
Had more than 5 previous pregnancies, Excess amniotic fluid, Unexplained 1st and 2nd trimester bleeding, and an unlisted issue
Augmented vaginal delivery at 36 weeks
Stillborn due to placental abruption
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 22

Had care from a DR
No pregnancy issues
Vaginal delivery at 39 weeks
Stillborn due to a cord accident
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 23

Had care from a DR
Had an Unlisted issue
Elective C-section at 40+ weeks
Neonatal loss due to multiple genetic anomolies
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 24

Had care from a DR
Had no issues
Emergency C-section due to prolonged labor at 40+ weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Infection, and Meconium Aspiration
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 25

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had no issues
Induced vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn due to unknown reasons
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 26

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had Incompetent Cervix
Augmented Vaginal Delivery at 22 weeks
Neonatal loss due to prematurity
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 27

Had dual care from a DR and Peri
Had an unlisted issue
Induced Vaginal Delivery at 30 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Unexplained, slight velementous cord insertion, low-ish amniotic fluid, slightly enlarged placenta, slightly enlarged cord
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 28

Had care from CNM
Had no issues
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth due to unknown reasons
Delivered by a CNM in the hospital

Respondent 29

Had care from a CPM
Had more than 5 previous pregnancies, unexplained 2nd trimester bleeding, excess amniotic fluid
Vaginal Delivery at 36 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to negligent midwife, prematurity
Delivered by Respondent 29's SO at home

Respondent 30
Had DR care
No pregnancy issues
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn or neonatal death after fetal distress, Negligent DR
Delivered by an OB

Respondent 31
Had CPM care
No known pregnancy issues
C-section at 39 weeks due to non reassuring NST
Neonatal death due to suspected cord accident, low fluid may have played a part
Delivered by OB

So far, the count is

12 OB 3 low risk

4 CNM 1 low risk

3 CPM 2 low risk

1 DEM

2 LM 1 low risk

1 Nobody

2 DR/Peri

4 DR/CNM 1 low risk

1 DR/CPM

1 DR/DEM/CPM/Peri

HB Transfers: 4

HB Deaths: 6

1 39 ND

1 39 SB

2 40+ ND

4 40+ SB

These are all healthy babies from low risk pregnancies. Yikes! I would say your baby has a higher chance of death once you hit 40 weeks, no matter who your provider is.

Our survey, more in depth

If you have filled out the survey and do not want me using your loss as a case, contact me and give me your info and I will take it out. My goal is not to exploit anyone's loss. I only wish to learn from them. I do not want my loss exploited, but, I do wish to share so that I can help someone else avoid the tragedy we have lived through. Nobody should have to bury their child. I also have to live with the guilt of knowing my choice to use this "experienced and trained" midwife led to my daughter's death. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.



Respondent 1

Had Care from a DR, CPM, and Peri
Had 1st trimester bleeding and an unlisted issue
Had an induced vaginal delivery in the hospital at 34 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to Bilateral Renal Agenesis
Delivered by a DR in the hospital



Respondent 2

Had care from a DR
Pregnancy had no issues
Had an emergency c-section at 26 weeks due to fetal decels
Stillbirth due to Genetic Issues incompatible with life
Delivered by a DR in the hospital



Respondent 3

Had care from a CNM
Had Hypertension and Intrauterine Growth Retardation
Induced Vaginal birth at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth due to Placental Insufficiency and Pregnancy Induced Hypertension
Delivered by CNM in the hospital

Respondent 4

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had Hypertension, Bleeding in the 1st trimester, Pre-eclampsia, and an unlisted issue
Augmented vaginal delivery at 36 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Infection, and Hep B Vaccine Reaction
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 5

Had care from a DR
Had Gestational Diabetes
Vaginal Delivery at 40+ weeks
Unsure if this was a Stillbirth or Neonatal loss but loss is due to Infection
Delivered by an OB (had to of been hospital as mother had a vaccum delivery and IV meds)

Respondent 6

Had care from a DR
Had Hypertension and Pre-Eclampsia
Elective C-section at 37 weeks
Neonatal loss due to unknown reasons
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 7

Had care from a DR, CPM, DEM, and Peri
Had unexplained bleeding in the first and second trimesters
Vaginal delivery at 22 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Prematurity
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 8

Had care from a CPM
No issues in the pregnancy
C-section at 40+ weeks (baby stopped moving)
Neonatal Loss due to Negligent Midwife
Delivered by an OB in the hospital

Respondent 9

Had care from a DR and Peri
Had an unlisted issue
PROM leading to Vaginal birth at 23 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Prematurity, Infection, Brain Damage from birth, NICU acquired illness, and Severe Critical Illness
Hospital delivery

Respondent 10

Had care from a DR
Had Incompetent Cervix and an Unlisted issue
Vaginal Delivery at 20 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to prematurity
Delivered by Respondent 10 at home

Respondent 11

Had care from a LM
No pregnancy issues
Elective c-section at 40+ weeks after homebirth transfer
Stillbirth due to unexplained issues
Delivered by a DR at the hospital

Respondent 12

Had care from a CNM
Had Advanced maternal Age
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth with Unexplained issues
Delivered at home by Respondent 12's SO

Respondent 13

Had care from a DR
Had an unlisted issue
Induced vaginal delivery at 26 weeks
Stillbirth due to Clotting disorder
Delivered in a Birth Center by DR

Respondent 14

Had care from a DR
Had an unlisted issue
Vaginal Delivery at 24 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Prematurity, and NICU acquired illness
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 15

Had care from a DEM
Had an unlisted issue
C-section at 40+ weeks after homebirth transfer
Stillborn due to Uterine Rupture, Negligent Midwife, read mother's HR for babies
Hospital delivery by a DR

Respondent 16

Had care from a CNM
Had Incompetent Cervix, Advanced maternal Age, and an unlisted issue
Augmented Vaginal delivery at 20 weeks
Stillborn due to Incompetent Cervix, GBS+, and Placental infection
Hospital delivery by a DR

Respondent 17

Had dual care with a DR and CNM
Had Gestational Diabetes, Excess Amniotic Fluid, and Preeclampsia
C-section at 36 weeks with breech baby
Neonatal loss due to genetic issues
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 18

Had care from a DR
Had Placenta Accreta
C-section at 32 weeks after trauma from a car accident
Neonatal Loss due to brain damage suffered after car accident
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 19

No Prenatal Care
Had an Unlisted issue
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn due to a cord accident
Delivered at home by Respondent 19

Respondent 20

Had care from a LM
Had an Unlisted issue
Vaginal delivery at 20 weeks
Neonatal loss due to prematurity
delivered at home by Respondent 20

Respondent 21

Had care from a DR
Had more than 5 previous pregnancies, Excess amniotic fluid, Unexplained 1st and 2nd trimester bleeding, and an unlisted issue
Augmented vaginal delivery at 36 weeks
Stillborn due to placental abruption
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 22

Had care from a DR
No pregnancy issues
Vaginal delivery at 39 weeks
Stillborn due to a cord accident
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 23

Had care from a DR
Had an Unlisted issue
Elective C-section at 40+ weeks
Neonatal loss due to multiple genetic anomolies
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 24

Had care from a DR
Had no issues
Emergency C-section due to prolonged labor at 40+ weeks
Neonatal loss due to Negligent DR, Infection, and Meconium Aspiration
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 25

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had no issues
Induced vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn due to unknown reasons
Delivered in the hospital by a DR

Respondent 26

Had dual care from a DR and CNM
Had Incompetent Cervix
Augmented Vaginal Delivery at 22 weeks
Neonatal loss due to prematurity
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 27

Had dual care from a DR and Peri
Had an unlisted issue
Induced Vaginal Delivery at 30 weeks
Neonatal loss due to Unexplained, slight velementous cord insertion, low-ish amniotic fluid, slightly enlarged placenta, slightly enlarged cord
Delivered by a DR in the hospital

Respondent 28

Had care from CNM
Had no issues
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillbirth due to unknown reasons
Delivered by a CNM in the hospital

Respondent 29

Had care from a CPM
Had more than 5 previous pregnancies, unexplained 2nd trimester bleeding, excess amniotic fluid
Vaginal Delivery at 36 weeks
Neonatal Loss due to negligent midwife, prematurity
Delivered by Respondent 29's SO at home

Respondent 30
Had DR care
No pregnancy issues
Vaginal delivery at 40+ weeks
Stillborn or neonatal death after fetal distress, Negligent DR
Delivered by an OB

Respondent 31
Had CPM care
No known pregnancy issues
C-section at 39 weeks due to non reassuring NST
Neonatal death due to suspected cord accident, low fluid may have played a part
Delivered by OB

So far, the count is

12 OB 3 low risk

4 CNM 1 low risk

3 CPM 2 low risk

1 DEM

2 LM 1 low risk

1 Nobody

2 DR/Peri

4 DR/CNM 1 low risk

1 DR/CPM

1 DR/DEM/CPM/Peri

HB Transfers: 4

HB Deaths: 6

1 39 ND

1 39 SB

2 40+ ND

4 40+ SB

These are all healthy babies from low risk pregnancies. Yikes! I would say your baby has a higher chance of death once you hit 40 weeks, no matter who your provider is.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Children are a blessing

As a grieving mother, I want people to see just how precious their children are and to act like it. If there is one thing that I want to come out of Mary's death, it is for a lightbulb moment to happen and someone take a look at their child and decide that they will do their very best for them.

1. Please do not drink while you are pregnant.
2. Please do not do any kind of drug. They are illegal for a reason.
3. Put down the cigarettes. for starters, cigarette smoke actualy kills spots of the placenta which leads to there being less nutrients for your growing baby. Essentially, you are starving your un born child. I use to smoke and know how addicting it is. But, as a mother, your kids come before you do!! If you are going to smoke, please do it away from your children. NO child should have to breathe that crap in. You are pretty much abusing your child by subjecting it to secondhand smoke.
4. Do not cuss at your children! I think that is pretty self explanatory.
5. Don't hit your children. A swat on the butt or a smack on the hand or mouth is understandable. However, to constantly be hitting, is abuse and it's wrong.
6. Never tell your child things like you hate them, wish they were dead, call them names, say you wish they lived with another person, etc. Speak love at all times.

Children are a blessing

As a grieving mother, I want people to see just how precious their children are and to act like it. If there is one thing that I want to come out of Mary's death, it is for a lightbulb moment to happen and someone take a look at their child and decide that they will do their very best for them.

1. Please do not drink while you are pregnant.
2. Please do not do any kind of drug. They are illegal for a reason.
3. Put down the cigarettes. for starters, cigarette smoke actualy kills spots of the placenta which leads to there being less nutrients for your growing baby. Essentially, you are starving your un born child. I use to smoke and know how addicting it is. But, as a mother, your kids come before you do!! If you are going to smoke, please do it away from your children. NO child should have to breathe that crap in. You are pretty much abusing your child by subjecting it to secondhand smoke.
4. Do not cuss at your children! I think that is pretty self explanatory.
5. Don't hit your children. A swat on the butt or a smack on the hand or mouth is understandable. However, to constantly be hitting, is abuse and it's wrong.
6. Never tell your child things like you hate them, wish they were dead, call them names, say you wish they lived with another person, etc. Speak love at all times.

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