In the Eyes of a Sibling

My daughter, age 11, chose to write about her sister for a Language Arts assignment. I just wanted to share.

                 By Mxxxxxxx Cxxxxxx

              The Little Angel                                                                                                                                                                 Little did I know that day was going to be the first and the last time I saw her. The day was June 5th, 2008. At the time I was only two all my siblings were there, Cxxx, Pxxxx, Exxxxx, and Jxxx. It was early in the morning suddenly my mom went into labor with her second home birth.                                                                        

 

   I was pushed out of the room and left puzzled while I heard my mom scream. Fourteen hours later a baby cried, “ It’s a healthy baby girl “, said brenda the midwife. We all got to hold her I was majorly excited about being a big sister. My mom went to sleep and we all played with mary the new baby. When I got to hold her I thought she smelled a little like baby powder. My dad thought mary went to sleep, but she wasn’t breathing he woke up my mom in a flash and they left for the hospital. I was honestly a little frightened, Mary was pronounced dead at the hospital and my parents held her for four hours crying no more like breaking down. They were forced to hand mary over, so they came home my older brother josh asked were the new baby was and they told us everything. I was very sad, We went to the funeral my mom bambi said “ we walked in mary was in a tiny casket we should have been burying her in a bassinet”. I saw her in her little white dress she was so adorable, I gave her a kiss and she was cold like ice.

In the end MaryBeth Chapman was taken from us as soon as she was given to us. She will always be our little angel.  

Hurt by Hospital Birth

Over the past 34 months homebirth advocates have taught me a lot. They have taught me that babies lost don't matter at all. They get angry when a homebirth death is shared and make comments about how the baby would of died anyway, babies die in the hospital too, and the location had nothing to do with it. They are incredibly rude and hurtful towards moms with any homebirth loss or injury. Obviously, when Dr Amy started up the Hurt by Homebirth site, we received serious backlash. Advocates were incredibly angry that there wasn't a hurt by hospital birth site. So, one San Diego area licensed midwife, named Vickii Gervais, decided to start a hurt by hospital birth site.

Now, what kind of stories are on this site?? How many mothers or babies died due to negligence?? How many mothers or babies were injured?? The answer to these questions is none. What consitutues being hurt by hospital birth??

Story 1: was a mom who ended up with an emergency c-section at 35 weeks for a footling breech. An inverted T incision was given in order to get baby out. Mom later had a VBA3C in the hospital with a supportive OB. The 4th child just happened to of also been her only full term baby. This was her blessing from Jesus!

Story 2: was a mom who didn't get her birth plan followed. She had fetal monitors strapped to her belly that were snug, didn't labor in the shower, didn't get her waterbirth, and was left to labor with her husband/family. Oh, then the drain was clogged in her shower.

Then story 3: Mom who (in 1975) was strapped down, given an IV, given oxygen, given an episiotomy and had her baby taken for 6 hours. That one did make me cringe. However, I took the opportunity to call my own mother and ask about birthing practices when I was born (1980). Turns out it was routine to rush you to a birthing room alone, do an enema, do an episiotomy, put legs in stirrups to push, then take baby for a bit. If you've had a baby in the last 20 years, you'll know this is no longer routine care. My mother was with me for the birth of my youngest and was quite impressed with all the changes made.

What really got me about these stories was their attempt at one-upping women who had their babies die. I would happily have a c-section or a deviation from my birth plan if it meant a living child. Are you trying to tell us that a non perfect birth experience is worse than having a dead baby?? Is your experience that much more important than the baby's??

This site thoroughly disgusts me and I cannot believe someone who calls themselves a professional would publish stories of women who weren't harmed or hurt by a hospital birth. They are women who sound like my children when I don't buy the flavor ice cream they wanted!

Hurt by Hospital Birth

Over the past 34 months homebirth advocates have taught me a lot. They have taught me that babies lost don't matter at all. They get angry when a homebirth death is shared and make comments about how the baby would of died anyway, babies die in the hospital too, and the location had nothing to do with it. They are incredibly rude and hurtful towards moms with any homebirth loss or injury. Obviously, when Dr Amy started up the Hurt by Homebirth site, we received serious backlash. Advocates were incredibly angry that there wasn't a hurt by hospital birth site. So, one San Diego area licensed midwife, named Vickii Gervais, decided to start a hurt by hospital birth site.

Now, what kind of stories are on this site?? How many mothers or babies died due to negligence?? How many mothers or babies were injured?? The answer to these questions is none. What consitutues being hurt by hospital birth??

Story 1: was a mom who ended up with an emergency c-section at 35 weeks for a footling breech. An inverted T incision was given in order to get baby out. Mom later had a VBA3C in the hospital with a supportive OB. The 4th child just happened to of also been her only full term baby. This was her blessing from Jesus!

Story 2: was a mom who didn't get her birth plan followed. She had fetal monitors strapped to her belly that were snug, didn't labor in the shower, didn't get her waterbirth, and was left to labor with her husband/family. Oh, then the drain was clogged in her shower.

Then story 3: Mom who (in 1975) was strapped down, given an IV, given oxygen, given an episiotomy and had her baby taken for 6 hours. That one did make me cringe. However, I took the opportunity to call my own mother and ask about birthing practices when I was born (1980). Turns out it was routine to rush you to a birthing room alone, do an enema, do an episiotomy, put legs in stirrups to push, then take baby for a bit. If you've had a baby in the last 20 years, you'll know this is no longer routine care. My mother was with me for the birth of my youngest and was quite impressed with all the changes made.

What really got me about these stories was their attempt at one-upping women who had their babies die. I would happily have a c-section or a deviation from my birth plan if it meant a living child. Are you trying to tell us that a non perfect birth experience is worse than having a dead baby?? Is your experience that much more important than the baby's??

This site thoroughly disgusts me and I cannot believe someone who calls themselves a professional would publish stories of women who weren't harmed or hurt by a hospital birth. They are women who sound like my children when I don't buy the flavor ice cream they wanted!