Malpractice- When your loved one is a money machine!

Yes, when you look into suing after the death of a baby, all you want is money to make yourself feel better. It'll make you soooo happy, too. Amiright??

WRONG!!! Why should bereaved parents or bereaved people in general be reimbursed when a loved one has died a preventable death at the hand of a negligent individual??

A. To help cover medical costs of the loved one. We all know medical costs are insane. It sucks, but it's life. These can either be costs already incurred or costs that will be incurred due to an error that resulted in injury. This can mean constant doctor appointments, hospitalizations, surgeries, medications, and therapies. What if a 24 hour nurse is needed??

B. Lost wages. Parents have to take off work, that's if they even have the option. Not all employers offer 3 days of bereavement pay. My husband was given it, but he was still asked to come into work the next day. Loved ones normally don't get paid if they have to spend days out of work. Now, if this is a spouse whose wages went into the family budget, that's totally gone leaving the surviving spouse struggling alone. Add in dependent children and their life will be drastically altered. Can that single mom making $10 an hour survive with three kids under 5?? What about it being a single mom that has died and now her parents are having to care for her two children while retired and on Social security?? What if there is an injured child and a parent has to stop working so they can care for this child? Or if a spouse or parent becomes disabled and people have to quit working to become caregivers??

C. Funeral costs. For an infant, costs can be quite low if parents find a funeral home offering free services and a cemetary offing a free burial, but that still costs something. Over 18 months, they get even more expensive. It took my mom years to pay off my sisters services and she was cremated. Burial plots can be up there. Ours was the cheapest around and was still $600. I've seen places here charging up to $2500 for one plot. This reminds me, we still have to hurry up and pay for our plot so nobody else can be beside our daughter.

D. Injuries/Disability- I touched on future medical costs and lost wages. What about having to move to a house that the disabled person can get around in easier?? What if you have to have medical equipment in the home?? What if a home has to be modified for the individual?? What about the costs of a wheelchair/scooter?? What about vehicle modifications or if modifications cannot be done and a special vehicle has to be purchased. Once a child gets big enough, you have to also have a special car seat in your vehicle. Some families can get assistance or help securing these, but what about those who can't??

So, suing for malpractice does not mean you are out for money. It means you are trying to keep your head above water and help reimburse you for expenses that should not of/should not be occurring. How anyone can accuse people of using their loved one as a money maker when suing for malpractice is beyond me. I guess until you are in those shoes, you cannot fathom suing and for that, be glad you don't understand. I use to think suing wouldn't bring someone back so why do it. Then I learned how expensive it can be when someone is suddenly dead because of malpractice. Money doesn't magically make pain go away. For those who think like the image above, I have to wonder if they think it's ok to sue for doctor injuries/negligence or if it's midwifery injuries/negligence that nobody should be able to sue for as that comment was directed to people who were saying CPM's should be carrying malpractice insurance and I was the only one with a dead baby.

Malpractice- When your loved one is a money machine!

Yes, when you look into suing after the death of a baby, all you want is money to make yourself feel better. It'll make you soooo happy, too. Amiright??

WRONG!!! Why should bereaved parents or bereaved people in general be reimbursed when a loved one has died a preventable death at the hand of a negligent individual??

A. To help cover medical costs of the loved one. We all know medical costs are insane. It sucks, but it's life. These can either be costs already incurred or costs that will be incurred due to an error that resulted in injury. This can mean constant doctor appointments, hospitalizations, surgeries, medications, and therapies. What if a 24 hour nurse is needed??

B. Lost wages. Parents have to take off work, that's if they even have the option. Not all employers offer 3 days of bereavement pay. My husband was given it, but he was still asked to come into work the next day. Loved ones normally don't get paid if they have to spend days out of work. Now, if this is a spouse whose wages went into the family budget, that's totally gone leaving the surviving spouse struggling alone. Add in dependent children and their life will be drastically altered. Can that single mom making $10 an hour survive with three kids under 5?? What about it being a single mom that has died and now her parents are having to care for her two children while retired and on Social security?? What if there is an injured child and a parent has to stop working so they can care for this child? Or if a spouse or parent becomes disabled and people have to quit working to become caregivers??

C. Funeral costs. For an infant, costs can be quite low if parents find a funeral home offering free services and a cemetary offing a free burial, but that still costs something. Over 18 months, they get even more expensive. It took my mom years to pay off my sisters services and she was cremated. Burial plots can be up there. Ours was the cheapest around and was still $600. I've seen places here charging up to $2500 for one plot. This reminds me, we still have to hurry up and pay for our plot so nobody else can be beside our daughter.

D. Injuries/Disability- I touched on future medical costs and lost wages. What about having to move to a house that the disabled person can get around in easier?? What if you have to have medical equipment in the home?? What if a home has to be modified for the individual?? What about the costs of a wheelchair/scooter?? What about vehicle modifications or if modifications cannot be done and a special vehicle has to be purchased. Once a child gets big enough, you have to also have a special car seat in your vehicle. Some families can get assistance or help securing these, but what about those who can't??

So, suing for malpractice does not mean you are out for money. It means you are trying to keep your head above water and help reimburse you for expenses that should not of/should not be occurring. How anyone can accuse people of using their loved one as a money maker when suing for malpractice is beyond me. I guess until you are in those shoes, you cannot fathom suing and for that, be glad you don't understand. I use to think suing wouldn't bring someone back so why do it. Then I learned how expensive it can be when someone is suddenly dead because of malpractice. Money doesn't magically make pain go away. For those who think like the image above, I have to wonder if they think it's ok to sue for doctor injuries/negligence or if it's midwifery injuries/negligence that nobody should be able to sue for as that comment was directed to people who were saying CPM's should be carrying malpractice insurance and I was the only one with a dead baby.

Priorities?

I normally don't write a lot because I usually need quite a bit of motivation. With today being friday, it's been a lazy day. I've watched the younger two girls play, played with them, made food, and took Ireland on a million trips to the potty (with no accidents). Course, I got to sit down and just read. As I was reading Dr. Amy's latest entry, there was a link provided to a message board where a mother shared her story of trying to labor then suddenly being rushed to the OR only to be administered general and sectioned without her consent. Her and the baby both ended up fine.

There are so many things that do not sit well with me here. Bear with me.

1. People are encouraging her to call the police to report this. Yet, when a homebirth goes south and a midwife screws up and a baby ends up dead, they want the police to leave the midwife alone!

2. People are yelling for this woman to sue. Yet, they support midwives being untouchable and don't believe they should be sued. They also scream that people need to stop filing lawsuits because they drive up medical costs.

3. This mother is seriously supported. Yet, they are the first ones to cast stones at mothers who lose babies due to negligent midwives.

4. This mom is encouraged to go to the media and share her story. Yet, those of us harmed by midwives need to just go hide under a rock.

5. They use this ONE story to tell women that this happens daily in hospitals across the USA. Yet, if we (yes, WE) warn, we are accussed of fear-mongering and they deny that midwives are negligent.

6. All those involved in this woman's care should lose their licenses. Yet, midwives shouldn't. Again, this woman's child is ALIVE, while our babies are all DEAD.

7. All medical personnel change your women's records so the real reasons for c-section seem legitimate. Yet, if we state our records were changed, nobody believes us.

8. It is a huge deal that she lost her birth. Yet, no biggie that we lost our children.

It really bothers me that women will latch onto something like this but not care about what women like me or Liz or Erin have been through. They take this and run, but our stories need to be silenced. Is it just me or is there something seriously lacking in these ladies priorities. I do know how many of these women behave because they are the same ones who would give me crap over what happened to me. Interesting, isn't it??

Priorities?

I normally don't write a lot because I usually need quite a bit of motivation. With today being friday, it's been a lazy day. I've watched the younger two girls play, played with them, made food, and took Ireland on a million trips to the potty (with no accidents). Course, I got to sit down and just read. As I was reading Dr. Amy's latest entry, there was a link provided to a message board where a mother shared her story of trying to labor then suddenly being rushed to the OR only to be administered general and sectioned without her consent. Her and the baby both ended up fine.

There are so many things that do not sit well with me here. Bear with me.

1. People are encouraging her to call the police to report this. Yet, when a homebirth goes south and a midwife screws up and a baby ends up dead, they want the police to leave the midwife alone!

2. People are yelling for this woman to sue. Yet, they support midwives being untouchable and don't believe they should be sued. They also scream that people need to stop filing lawsuits because they drive up medical costs.

3. This mother is seriously supported. Yet, they are the first ones to cast stones at mothers who lose babies due to negligent midwives.

4. This mom is encouraged to go to the media and share her story. Yet, those of us harmed by midwives need to just go hide under a rock.

5. They use this ONE story to tell women that this happens daily in hospitals across the USA. Yet, if we (yes, WE) warn, we are accussed of fear-mongering and they deny that midwives are negligent.

6. All those involved in this woman's care should lose their licenses. Yet, midwives shouldn't. Again, this woman's child is ALIVE, while our babies are all DEAD.

7. All medical personnel change your women's records so the real reasons for c-section seem legitimate. Yet, if we state our records were changed, nobody believes us.

8. It is a huge deal that she lost her birth. Yet, no biggie that we lost our children.

It really bothers me that women will latch onto something like this but not care about what women like me or Liz or Erin have been through. They take this and run, but our stories need to be silenced. Is it just me or is there something seriously lacking in these ladies priorities. I do know how many of these women behave because they are the same ones who would give me crap over what happened to me. Interesting, isn't it??

The stresses of Attachment Parenting

Reading Babycenter's Debate Team last night, a woman posted about how her AP sister has been so stressed out that she hit her 2.5 year old son as hard as she could. She called her mother to get the child and Grandma refused to give the child back. This thread was rather eye opening. Many AP mothers confessed that they had all hit breaking points and hit their child out of anger. No wonder they always assume people who spank do so in anger, because that's the reason they do it!

In addition to all these confessions of hitting children out of anger, it was also shared that this child had not ever been away from his mom and others stated their child hadn't been a part from mom either. No wonder AP moms are so stressed. You don't have to have your kid attached to you 24/7 in order to be a good mother and obviously, it is stressful never having a break from this role.

I would really love to see the number of divorces for AP Moms and Mainstream Moms. Mainstream mothers seem to have an identity outside their children while AP moms generally don't. I have read of women sleeping with their child instead of sharing a bed with their spouse. No way would I give up having my husband next to me! How many AP husbands feel neglected because his wife is stuck in mommy mode and can't just be that woman he fell in love with??

For this child in this situation, the husband told her to just let her child stay with Grandma and mom refused while acting incredibly irrational. That child is now in CPS custody. Way to go mom! You're so attached, your child is being cared for by strangers because you couldn't just let him stay with grandma for a few days!

The stresses of Attachment Parenting

Reading Babycenter's Debate Team last night, a woman posted about how her AP sister has been so stressed out that she hit her 2.5 year old son as hard as she could. She called her mother to get the child and Grandma refused to give the child back. This thread was rather eye opening. Many AP mothers confessed that they had all hit breaking points and hit their child out of anger. No wonder they always assume people who spank do so in anger, because that's the reason they do it!

In addition to all these confessions of hitting children out of anger, it was also shared that this child had not ever been away from his mom and others stated their child hadn't been a part from mom either. No wonder AP moms are so stressed. You don't have to have your kid attached to you 24/7 in order to be a good mother and obviously, it is stressful never having a break from this role.

I would really love to see the number of divorces for AP Moms and Mainstream Moms. Mainstream mothers seem to have an identity outside their children while AP moms generally don't. I have read of women sleeping with their child instead of sharing a bed with their spouse. No way would I give up having my husband next to me! How many AP husbands feel neglected because his wife is stuck in mommy mode and can't just be that woman he fell in love with??

For this child in this situation, the husband told her to just let her child stay with Grandma and mom refused while acting incredibly irrational. That child is now in CPS custody. Way to go mom! You're so attached, your child is being cared for by strangers because you couldn't just let him stay with grandma for a few days!

BabyCenter Group

I have created a group on babycenter just for moms who either were planning a homebirth or had a homebirth and lost their baby. I know I am not the only one!

BabyCenter Group

I have created a group on babycenter just for moms who either were planning a homebirth or had a homebirth and lost their baby. I know I am not the only one!